Currently:

I’m laying on my bed in a huge pile of clothes that need to be sorted, hung up & packed away. And my poor little Jade is lying next to me. She has the saddest eyes ever right now. I think it’s because she’s sleepy.

she’s spent most of the day with me. lounging about while I try to force myself to clean and pack and “work”. I did make progress though. my armoir and nightstands are completely cleaned out. my dresser is halfway emptied. nothing is hiding under my bed anymore :)

all I really have left is to do all my laundry tomorrow, pack a weekend bag, pack up my closet and find a way to make all of this fit in my car. haha. that will be the biggest challenge of all. I feel like I’m hardly taking ANYTHING with me.. which, is better, I know. even still, it’s going to be a tight fit.
I’m leaving here in about 20 minutes to drive up to The Dalles to see my miss Arlie Cates one more time before the move. TONIGHT IS MY LAST NIGHT IN MY BED for a long time. woah. that just hit me. my last night in my house.

I will probably cry myself to sleep tonight.
darn it.

I was doing so well this week. but now, I feel like the dam’s about to break loose.. I only have to make it one more day.

it just sucks because you’re trying so hard to keep your emotions in check that you don’t exhibit ANY.. you just, sort of mechanically do the things you know you need to do.

I’ve been avoiding talking about the move.. I am excited. I do want to share it with people. But putting all my stuff in boxes almost makes me lose it. I know if I try to look my parents in the eye or think about driving away I’ll just be done for. and I’m not ready for that yet. I can’t do that yet. I absolutely know I’ll be a blubbering fool when I have to leave, I don’t need to start now.

xo